I had planned today and Sunday as packing days but Saturdays team did so well that Sundays crew received a cancellation notice. I was in amazement on how awesome my friends and family were today. Thank you Marie, Michelle, Steph, Mom, Renee, Cindy, Trista, Melissa and Rick.
Friday I went back to my apartment after hyperbaric treatment and spent the day relaxing and snuggling with Simba. He's catching on that we're moving and I'm seeing some stress in him. As I slept in my own bed for the first time in weeks, Simba slept on my arm the whole night. We were both glad to be together again. Sounds like I'm talking about a love story or something, but it's my cat, however he's my boy...my Sim-Sim. I can't wait for our move to be done so he and I can have some "normal" routine back in our lives. It'll be puuuurrrrr-fect!
After Wednesdays concert panic attack and a long day again today, I found myself crying once home at mom and dads. Even though I'm not doing the heavy lifting I was juggling "hey Carly how do you...." questions all day and was on my feet way too long. I get these good days or glimpses of feeling great so add a bit more to my list of things to do, but seems I suffer thereafter with exhaustion and/or a good cry. I don't hold back my tears but I must tell you I'm sick of crying. I'm sick of being sick, but I can't change that. I must push forward...this too shall pass.
Theoretically I'm currently cancer free....this I need to repeat over and over again reminding myself how great that is. Unfortunately becoming cancer free has left me with wounds that need to heal and I need to tell myself I'm not a super-woman who heals faster than the speed of light! I am human, I am in recovery, I must relax.
Just now laying in bed writing this blog, I turned over & got that incredibly painful fire-like pain shooting through my right leg. I don't feel it when walking or standing, just when laying down. It's the oddest thing and neurology swears it's pelvic nerve damage from radiation but who knows. Hope as I heal it goes away.
Tomorrow I'll remain home vs going back to my apartment for the last small detail packing. Mom and dad are confident they can do the last few things easily along with the help of my godfather. Dad went out tonight and got Simba some good tasty wet food that he'll feed him tomorrow. Think somebody has caught the Simba bug LOL
The NFL playoffs are back Sunday with Green Bay vs Seattle. I've loved GB since I was a kid & dream of going to a home game wearing cheese on my head but of course also want to see our "local' team get the win. I think Seattle is too tough to beat but I'll win either way liking both teams.
This weekend I take courage from the NFL. You can bang me up & stitch me up but my race for the win never stops!
#carly2conquercancer
XOXO
C
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