While in the pool a lady asked if it was too hard for me. I told her my situation and she said other survivors are also in the class. I didn't get to chat with any of these ladies as half way thorough I got out of the pool. It's funny...I was angry at myself for not finishing. Physically I could do the exercises but my insides told me different. Crohn's Disease introduced itself to me today, all day, and fiercely.
The rest of today has been agony. The pain was like radiation all over again and tears were flowing. My mom and then my aunt had to come be with me as I was a mess. Lately I've been feeling better than not, so this set back has gotten to me, I really wanted today to go smoothly. I'd made an inspirational exercise calendar, chose my venue, pumped myself up and now have to re-think this all over again. Although I didn't find today challenging physically, my body told me it's not ready to such an extreme. Instead of Aquafit I'll try a stretching class or a beginners yoga or weights.
Today was a brutal day but I can't let it define me. As much as I want to give up I can't, I got to push through and try something else. My hope is I can train my body & over time get back in to the pool, just got to take baby steps even though my mind is ready to jump right in. The winning spirit I hold inside has to take a back seat to reality but hopefully over time that'll change.
Tomorrow night I'm going to the Unique Lives event at the Orpheum with Katyann. Valerie Harper is the speaker and I look forward to hearing how she overcame her cancer hardships and life challenges. Some inspiration after a bad day is welcome and hope the Canucks get a win too!