Well.... it's been a while since I last wrote and that's for many reasons. I was doing well health wise, was happily working and wasn't sure how to continue my passion for writing when the original cause was pretty much gone. I had some conversations with relatives and friends about how much I loved writing and some ideas did come up but along with those ideas a few health bumps have come forward as well.
Up until Feb/March I was riding high feeling really good. I was thriving in pretty much all aspects but started to feel Crohn's side effects, severe fatigue and even discomfort. Often I'd just shrug it off as I've been told my new normal is something I have to learn to push through, so I did, but it was harder than before. Not wanting to complain and be considered the "sick girl" I struggled mostly silent except sharing with those closest to me or when necessary at work.
Jump to May and my routine PET scan came about. Previous scans have been good so off I go in a matching sweatsuit (Canucks hoodie matched my Mavi sweats) and get through the scan as per usual. I wasn't able to connect with my oncologist until month end and having not recieved a phone call, thought no news is good news. Good news is my cancer HAS NOT returned to its original spot and Dr Lee is confident if it was to, it would have by now. Awesome I said. But then she explained a couple more things.
Remember that alien I spoke of throughout my battle? Well apparently it's grown in size and the PET scan image showed activity. It's now 6cm x 3cm. Say what??? OK I said, what's the plan of attack? Well wait there's another area that lit up too, your thyroid. Say what?? Imaging shows it to be approximately 14mm in size. My cool collected inner voice is now freaking out although I remain calm with my doc so I can collect all information to properly understand. So basically you're still cancer free, but 2 areas are of concern and need to be checked out. Off I went to the 3rd floor for blood work.
Another memory lane moment as I handed my slip to the check-in for blood work. I tend to faint and even had the crash cart called on me once during treatment, so asked they lay me down just in case! So we did and she got the sample without complication. The next day Dr Lee calls me and advised normal TSH readings vary from 0.3 to 4.8. Mine was an astounding 31.6! This is a hypo thyroid which means my metabolism is totally out of whack & slow and my energy levels way down. Seems some of my symptoms I was trying to push through were now making sense. An ultrasound has been ordered and pending ultrasound results a possible biopsy.
While all this is developing I already had a scheduled colonoscopy for the following Tuesday. Tuesday comes and my gastro dr doesn't seem to really know where this alien is! I told them all about it pre-op but I'm still confused as to what happened. When I was coming out of sedation mode I could hardly tell you my middle names let alone what he was saying. I did hear 2 biopsies were done. I'm calling his office tomorrow to hopefully get a better idea as I'm a tad confused. He has prescribed me a sterioid to help with my Crohn's and also a treatment regime to rid the fistula I unfortunately have and can feel. But let's move on from that ok lol
I'm trying to be humorous Carly with a funny pain in the ass joke, but for real I'm struggling. My energy is so low lifting my arm is a chore. I can hardly get out of bed and I share it with a skinny old cat! My hope and prayer is that these complications are just that and with proper medication are easily manageable. I won't tell you my mind hasn't wandered down the cancer road today, it has numerous times and will again tomorrow. Until my results are back I have to try to push through these thoughts but man it's not easy. I had a mini cry with dad as he drove me in today and a bigger cry mixed with anger with mom as she drove me home. Try to find foods that will help my energy but not activate my Crohn's. Try - try - try will become do - do - do, it's just a matter of time. Right? Right.
It's now 130 as I wrap up this blog typing in bed in my dark room. My fan always on as I find the old 1980s beaten up fan quite relaxing as background noise. The garden sprinklers just came on. Say what? It's time for bed.
Missed writing...I'll be back!
XOXO
C
#carly2conquercancer
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