Seems every time I head to Centennial Beach the tide is out. Maybe this is a sign of sorts? Ah who am I kidding I'm not a mambo-jumbo kind of gal, I just need to pay attention or read a chart and know when the tide is in!
Today Sarah, aka Frenchie, came out to Tsawwassen for a visit. En route to picking her up at the River Rock Casino skytrain station, I noticed a big delay coming back via the tunnel as a result of an accident, so we took the long way home but made it nonetheless. I don't think Sarah, a Vancouver downtown native, has ever seen the Alex Fraser Bridge so a little geography lesson was added in to our day.
It was nice to catch up with an old friend and we found ourselves reminiscing on how we met to how old Simba is...he's gonna be 14...we sat at the beach and then came back home for dinner on my patio. It was such an easy day. No cancer worries, no Crohn's flares....and I was happy, however I was in pain.
For the last while I've been doing my best at being active somehow everyday and decided to add sit ups in to my exercise routine. I use a medice ball to do these sit ups and now I can barely sit up...literally! Just laughing hurts for crying out loud but I'll take this pain as a win. Think there's some sort of slogan..oh yeah....no pain no gain!!!
I went to the cancer agency for a checkup Wednesday as I wasn't feeling quite right close to where my lymph nodes were removed. I was super scared and might have cried with Dr Haywood....and the intern too poor girl! But he reassured me that what I'm feeling is healing tissue from surgery and radiation. My upcoming PET scan will confirm but he thinks all looks good.
As happy as I was to hear this news I was really emotional. Thank goodness for sunglasses as I cried the whole way home. I think I was so busy being strong while in treatment I didn't really let myself feel how serious things were and can be. Surgery can happen if cancer comes back almost anywhere except my groin, so I just felt so mortal and helpless. I drove straight to my mom and hugged her while I cried and things got better. Then I had a huge change of scenery as it was Eli's 8th birthday so went over the celebrate how cool he is.
This recovery process is hard and we all handle things differently. I accepted I didn't want to have kids years ago but found myself in tears the other day not knowing what a skinnier version of me would look like. (insert laughter here). But that only lasted for a minute and all is well again.
I sure sound like a cry baby in this blog don't I!! I'll blame it on my hormones and to be honest I usually feel better after a good cry. You do too right? Right???? Lol
XOXO
#carly2conquercancer
C
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