Phases

What’s a phase to you? Perhaps fashion, hair or even friends? Up until 2014 I had phases similar to these. My Madonna inspired short cut (not a good phase FYI). I lived in a house with 4 girls, where all we drank was Molson Dry. I’m not a beer gal but that was one heck of a Xmas party. We mailed out invites, yes kids, no email in 1998!  My fashion love phase has grown stronger but currently on hiatus. 

These last 4 years have brought on 2 cancer battles so my phases were now about chemo, radiation, surgery and recovery. Then after the recovery phase seemed to end in 2016, it brought a year of dancing at my local pub, working even though I struggled, along with great new friends in a new community. 

This 2nd recovery phase has been tough, even if you know you’ll improve week by week. Surgery-hospital-home. There’s the learning on how to walk again, how to seem sane on medications, (I posted Instagram videos high at weird times lol) & learning how to manage your colostomy. The plastics phase has yet to reveal itself, bit early still. 

Now that my 18 day hospital stay is over, I’ve been in my home phase for just shy of a month. Unreal to know I could hardly stand when I came home, and now I shimmy out of my couch with no help needed. I’ve got the emptying of my colostomy bag Winnie down to 5 strips of TP with which I clean it. I recently started standing in my shower no longer requiring a bench and nurse. I still can’t bend or be on my feet for extended amounts of time. So this phase annoyingly makes me ask you for help. Help putting on my socks and shoes. I need you to be in my home while I shower just in case I fall. I need you to prep me food so it’s easy for me to warm it up. I need you to help scoop Simbas kitty box (Ew! sorry lol). It’s so great to be at these points but I’ve got so much more to follow. The bending phase is coming then y’all are off the hook! 

My swelling is getting less every week it’s just taking time. When it’s over, Winnie and I will be able to sit up straight for an entire meal and join you in a restaurant. Oh the little phases we take for granted. I’ve really looked at things by phases so I don’t jump too far ahead. If I don’t keep it real and do the work, I won’t get there. And if I’m being completely honest I have zero clue of what “there” is...TBD.  One thing I have learned through my phases thus far, Winnie is the best thing to ever happen to me. I’m starting to feel like the real me in so many ways. This is my best phase yet!

On a serious personal note....

A dear man known to me as Uncle Petey passed away recently. I’d like you to know he was talented with many things including welding. For my 21st birthday he created me what we called ‘Mannequin Man’ but really it’s a structure to toss clothes on after they’re worn. Thanks uncle Petey for this gift over 20 years ago....it’s always used as an excuse not to hang something!  I see you everyday in your creation and remember you always.  #foreveryoung

XOXO

C

#carly2conquercancer

#winniethepouch