I took in that first Stampede experience like most did. I visited the popular tent venue with amazing bands, enjoyed beer gardens even though I wasn’t a beer drinker and went to an actual rodeo. I wasn’t a big fan of the rodeo part and never would have thought I’d use the “ain’t my first rodeo” line years later over and over again. As the years passed my friends and I had more Stampede fun off grounds at pubs and bars in the entertainment district which I also happened to live in.
This past Sunday I woke up in excruciating pain. I’d been having some pain the last few months with my skin around my stoma, and when I woke up I knew the pain was at an all time high. My skin had always been healthy up to a few months back so I was doing what I could to get it back that way. Unfortunately the skin wasn’t going back to where it was and I also noticed some discolouration on my stoma. A stoma is your intestine coming out of your stomach (stool passes through it) and should be a nice pinky red colour. The last while mine had a greeny-brown layer which my ostomy nurse thought could mean a lack of blood flow. We watched it closely but it never went away. The stoma has no feeling so it wasn’t bothersome but the skin around it where my pouch adheres to was/is very raw and sore. I developed mini ulcers on the surrounding skin making movement and wearing a pouch very uncomfortable.
I called my parents at 7:15am in tears. My folks and anyone else who knows me well, know I’m not an early riser so if the phone rings early something is definitely up. Soon after dad was driving me to Vancouver General Hospital (VGH) with my packed bag in tow. You see when you go to the hospital on the regular like I have over the past 6 years, you learn what things you need with you. Extension chord, iPad, ear phones, loose PJ top to avoid the gown when possible that can also pull up for an IV, don’t forget the stuffy to snuggle with and of course ostomy supplies. Most times there won’t be a specialized nurse working and the ER has little supplies on hand. In I walk with a backpack full but I’m ready for a long day or many days.
I get in to the admissions room wearing a mask of course since were in the middle of a pandemic, and the phrase “ain’t my first rodeo” comes out of my mouth. I’m sure the staff and nurses hear this all the time but I know my chart. I know how hard getting an IV in my non existent veins is, and usually where to put the IV as I’ll most likely have a CT scan and it needs to be in a certain spot. 3 nurses and 6 attempts later I finally have an IV, fluids helping me hydrate and morphine helping soothe my pain.
As the doctors come to evaluate me my pouch of course needs to be off. Out comes my kit from my backpack and I show them some tricks. I lay there in between visits with a towel over me as there’s no reason to put on a new pouch to only take it off again. Since I have a colostomy and had not eaten there’s no output anyway so all was OK. Eventually I have a CT scan (pouch on now) and when I see the doctors a couple hours later they explain they’d like to perform a biopsy. Wwwhhhhaaaatttttt?
“Not my first rodeo doc, go for it” I say. They freeze the skin (the stoma has no feeling) and the biopsy begins. The sheet with the hole lays over me and I look the other way. I never shed a tear because I had done that earlier on when I was in pain and admitted. I just lay there, they perform the biopsy, a few stitches on my skin , my stoma scrapped and it’s over. New pouch on. Pain prescription written and discharged. The doctors office will call me with biopsy results hopefully within a week.
I’m getting ready to leave and it hits me. I may possibly have cancer for a 3rd time in 6 years....WTF! The last surgery was aggressive and I wasn’t supposed to be here again but there are no guarantees with anything is there. Just got to deal Carly...just got to deal. I made friends with nurses while in the ER, counselled a young woman who I was sharing a room with (kidney infection) and even stripped my bed on the way out. It’s all part of my rodeo routine. Dad picked me up, got some food on the way home, then after dinner discovered blood in my pouch. Back to the ER I went but it wasn’t a long stay, just a clot needing some attention.
After a good day of bed rest and pain medication I’m doing better. I saw my ostomy nurse today and trying a couple new things to see if that helps my skin. Skin issues are very common for ostomates so this rodeo will come up from time to time. Now I wait to get the call letting me know if in fact cancer is back or (fingers crossed) if I have some sort of infection. Until then I’m remaining calm but also preparing because after all this isn’t my first rodeo.
Xoxo
C
#carly2conquercancer
#winniethepouch
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